Cats and Dogs
by AnneAquila
Summary: A one-shot on how Sirius met Crookshanks and an unlikely friendship sprung between them. Features Grumpy cat as Crookshanks, a mentioned-but-not-present mistress as Hermione and Sirius as himself.


**A/N**: Hello there m'peeps! It's been a while, hasn't it? This took me a while to write, but here it is! It's been submitted for the IWSC, check out the others if you have the time! Also, thank you Vanilla for beta'ing this fic!

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**School**: Beauxbatons

**Year**: Second Year

**Theme**: Potions- Elixir to Induce Euphoria

**Prompts**: Sirius Black [Main Character][**Main prompt**], Drizzling-Rain [Weather], Pointy nose [Facial Feature]

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**Cats and Dogs**

_By AK_

* * *

_Cold, cold, cold, will there never be warmth?_

A wan man with a thin face and a pointed nose glanced at the sky with hollow eyes. Sparse clouds had gathered and rain fell to the ground in a light drizzle. Damp spots appeared on his tattered robes and his back shook in a never ending shiver.

He might have left Azkaban.

But will Azkaban ever leave him?

* * *

With shaking hands and his knees a hair's breadth from giving way, he opened the creaky door to one of the places he had spent the full moon nights of his later school years. The air was stale due to the boarded windows of the Shrieking Shack stagnating its flow. Still, nostalgia choked him up and tears sprang into his eyes.

He was too frightened to sleep on the musty bed with dusty covers as it laid in the line of sight of one of the few openings which let the faint moonlight stream in. He transformed into his animagus form once more and shimmied underneath it, the dust tickling his nose.

It was a far cry from the comforts that he took for granted at the Black Mansion but a farther cry still from the horrors of Azkaban. He could make do. And anyways, at least he didn't have that noisy portrait of his grandmother poking her pointy nose into his business.

There would be no sleep tonight. His palpitating heart was too high-strung from his drastic escape; his nerves too frayed from the treatment of the dementors; his weary brain taunted endlessly by the ghosts of the past.

He sighed to himself. No, there would be no sleep tonight.

He could almost feel James at his back, his hearty laughter sounding beside him. He could almost feel Lupin's cool gaze, exasperated to the core but fond, so fond. He could almost faintly remember Lily's fresh fragrance, even though she had come very few times. Thinking back to the time when he sneered at James for inviting Lily to their 'secret hideout', he scoffed at the foolish willfulness of his younger self and wished that she could have visited more often.

Merlin, he missed them so…

Rats' intestines, he even wished Snape was here, that mean, squinty-eyed, pointy-nosed little Snivellus! All things said and done, he was not nearly as bad as they had made him out to be. At the very least, he was a million times better than that slimy, no-good, backstabbing _rat_-

Sirius took a sudden breath to quell that sudden surge of anger. Its intensity had taken him by surprise. But then his eyes darkened and his lips curved in a mirthless smile.

What else could you expect from the insanity that kept him sane? What else could you expect from the soul-shattering grief that kept him alive? What else? And now the dementors were out of the picture…

Like a tug of war between two devils, he had been caught between two states of mindlessness and had, by some miracle, been able to keep his will where others lost theirs. It was a boon, a bane, the meaning of his life.

Peter Pettigrew must die.

* * *

_Claws against wood_…

Sirius was in a state between consciousness and unconsciousness. Exhausted to the core, his first night away from the care of those soul-suckers did him a world of good. Some colour returned to his face and the seemingly permanent furrow in his brow eased minutely.

_Padding of footsteps…_

Lupin is that you? But no… your steps are too light… if not you then… IS IT THAT FILTHY THIRD RATE- No, that can't be either; the steps are too heavy… Dementors do not walk and even if they did, the sound of their foot falls would not be the first thing that one would notice about them.

_But then… what could it be?_

Sirius Black startled awake at the sudden realization and came face-to-face with a ginger coloured, squash faced grump of a cat. He looked into its oddly clever eyes in stupefaction.

"Hullo," he said aloud. Of course, it was a mere bark when it left his lips. He was still in his animagus form after all. Even so, he was surprised by the gruffness of his own voice. Even more so, he was surprised at how nonplussed the cat was.

He gave another, rather meek, bark. The cat looked at him with no little contempt. Sirius was caught between irritation and startled amusement. Cats were afraid of dogs, weren't they? Wasn't that the way of the world?

Shaking his head, he carefully peered outside through one of the gaps in the boards. The village of Hogsmeade was as busy as ever and Sirius was darkly amused. A sudden drizzle started once more and the people in the open scurried here and there, hoping to get things done quickly and get to shelter before the rain poured down in earnest.

What a trivial thing to worry about.

He wondered how long it would take before the news of his breaking out would spread, before panic would settle in their hearts, before the hustle and bustle of the small village would turn into dead silence…

"Meow," said the pudgy cat.

"Gruff," replied Sirius absentmindedly. Just how pathetic was his life that he'd be making one-sided conversation with a cat?! Well, there's not much lower he can go…

The cat looked at him with an almost intelligent sparkle in its eyes.

"Meow?" The sound was almost questioning, almost as if… it was asking 'may I help you?'

As if on cue, Sirius's stomach rumbled.

The cat gave a thoughtful purr.

Sirius, preoccupied with his own thoughts, did not notice any of this happening. His mind was filled with the voices of people long lost. The cat took one last look and left the shack.

* * *

A few hours later, the cat returned with a stolen, ahem, _borrowed_, bag in its mouth. It looked twice as grumpy with its fluffy fur matted down with the light rain. But the sun was shining now, so the cat went up to the noon sunlight streaming through the crack between the boards of the window and did its best to sunbathe.

Sirius, still lost in his thoughts, whipped his head around at its arrival. His keen nose sniffed out food and his hunger, which he had ignored till now, burst forth like a savage beast.

The cat looked upon the dog as it dug into the goodies with reckless abandon. Be it the low grade meat, the tasteless bread or the sugary sweet candy, all of it was scarfed down without the slightest hesitation.

It meowed in warning but the dog paid no heed.

The cat seemed to frown. From its skin and bone appearance, the dog obviously hadn't eaten in a while. If it ate so much and so quickly, it would most certainly have adverse effects…

No sooner said than done. The dog suddenly stopped its frenzied eating. Looking quite sick, it slinked to the side and collapsed with its paws on its stomach. The dog noticed the cat looking at it. Maybe it was a trick of the light, or maybe it was just its face, but the cat seemed to have raised a single eyebrow at the dog.

The dog just howled despondently in response.

* * *

Sirius felt like dying. The cat was smarter than he was! Ah reason, thou truly hath fled to beasts…

This time, Sirius noticed the thoughtful look leveled upon him but the cat before it left the shack once more.

Sirius was spooked.

_That couldn't have been Professor McGonagall, could it?_

...Nah. Couldn't be.

No matter how you looked at it, the cat was not a tabby cat.

* * *

Three days passed before the cat came back. The triumphant look on its face was evident. Sirius who had just begun to miss the ginger creature looked at his with some happiness.

"Gruff," he greeted the cat.

"Meow," it mewed haughtily in response.

It placed a small vial in front of him. Sirius looked at it curiously. It was pale yellow, low viscosity and his sharp nose picked up the faint hint of peppermint. He had memorized his potions text book in his youth and his sharp mind now tried to cross-check the hints in his hands with the characteristics of various potions.

As he turned the vial in his paws, the name of the owner came to view. Sirius was not sure whether to laugh or to cry. The pointy nosed visage of his old nemesis came to mind.

'Severus Snape'.

Sirius wondered what the cat had gone through in order to get this potion to him. Well, it would be a pity if its efforts were wasted. And Snivellus wouldn't store such a thing if it was a faulty product.

It was too difficult to open with his canine appearance, so he reverted to his human form. He looked at the cat curiously, awaiting a surprised response. Surely it would be entertaining…?

But no, the cat was nonplussed. It seemed to sigh to itself, 'What a foolish animal. It must be a human. What else could it be?'

Sirius didn't want to provoke the cat any further. Within moments, he had plopped the vial open and downed its contents.

He closed his eyes to observe its effects.

At first, nothing happened. But then, slowly but surely, the knot that had tightened around his throat, that guilty lump that kept him from breathing freely slowly dissolved. A sudden feeling of peace flooded through him.

He finally turned back into the cat.

"Elixir to Induce Euphoria," he said. He smiled, gentle. "It won't work for long, you know? It's only a temporary cure. It's mainly used to cure depression. I'm not depressed, I am… obsessed. It is a different kind of madness-"

Sirius tried his best to put into words what he had held in his heart for twelve long years. Once he did, he felt tonnes better. Thinking that it had to do something with the cat, he started telling it about himself, his friends, and his story.

The cat looked at him, silent, observing. Sirius smiled, "You seem so intelligent that I feel like I'm talking to an actual person!"

The cat looked at him thoughtfully. It left the shack once more. It took an entire month to return.

* * *

The plaintive meow at the door startled Sirius deeply. He looked at the cat that he hadn't expected to see at all after its long absence. It looked at him, solemn.

Sirius looked more haggard than any sane man on the road, but he looked a lot better than how he first looked as an escaped convict. But still, his eyes were hollow, so hollow that you'd wonder if his soul had stayed with the dementors.

When the cat entered, he took to his animagus form and looked curiously at it.

The cat's eyes were solemn as he placed three objects in front of him.

The first was a piece of cloth. Sniffing at it, his heart seized his throat as he realized that it belonged to Lupin. He took it gently, as if it were a precious treasure.

The second was a piece of paper. It had a few nonsensical words put together. What did it mean- oh never mind, the words 'Fat Lady- passwords' was written on the top of the page. Sirius looked at it in disbelief. What a stroke of luck!

The third item was- what was that even? Something bloody, a bit slimy… Something happened that hadn't happened in a while. Sirius's blood began to boil. Not the hot flashes of temper that had come and gone in the recent days. No, it was a cold kind of anger that ran deep and begrudging. It was a piece of Wormtail's tail.

He looked outside the window. A drizzle had started. Sirius grinned, hoping for a storm. If that happened, it would be easier to get inside the castle.

_I have you now, bastard._

Sirius looked at the cat admiringly. It was much more useful than what one would guess at first sight. Sirius felt a rush of affection towards it and wondered if he could adopt it as a pet.

* * *

Crookshanks looked at Sirius with an air of contentment. Yes, finally the human is cured. The gloominess has been brought down to a minimum.

_Now come to the castle my brave knight. Rid me of that filthy rat! Make it stay the heck away from my mistress. She has enough on her plate without that red-head thing pestering her anyways. Posthaste!_

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**A/N**: Well that's it for now! Ah, just a quick note for my readers who may be confused: Sirius Black is most certainly depressed. However, as many people who are depressed do, he vehemently denies it.


End file.
